the times we spent
all gone and grey
what should have been said
wasnt said anyway.

i wish i can tell you
i'll catch you when you fall.
but why am i the one falling,
and you're not there at all.

im all about being selfish.
i want the same back from you.
and yes, im being childish,
i've been acting like a fool.

and still everyone thinks im strong,
just cause i have a attitude.
they hate it when im fragile,
they dont see the things you do.

i can stand on my feet,
but i cant feel them at all.
why are they so numb?
maybe i've been waiting too long.

i want to say i can let go,
i want to say its nothing to me anymore.
i want to say no one can make me cry,
i want to say i wont believe another lie.

they are living in a real life fairytale,
im living in real life.
it gets harder to come by,
im waiting in line.

and should we all be toys in love,
i'll be a box of lego.
you can piece me together,
and tear me apart.

and im all about being colourful,
and all about being strong.
im just another plastic,
underneath it all.

be my guardian angel -
i'll be waiting for you ;
for i loved you -
im kind of confused over feelings ;
my whole mind is twirling -
how do i overcome those saddness ;
when the movie played again and again -
who will be responsible for that?
maybe you or me.
i just need to know something from you.
the truth that i've been waiting for.
i'll be waiting, remember .


woo, anyhw think deh. (: also so nice.
lalalas xD loves everyone.

TIANTIAN(:


so busy this few days larhs. had piano exam today. was shivering. i played wrong notes.
i prepared for the worst. i may fail that whole thing ): . i jus gt the feeling lorhes.
sians. after that, went eat buffet wif mama at goodwoodpark hotel (: the buffet was cheap.
onr person 28. dhan in total only 57 (: . so cheap . like half the price of wad we ate at suntec.
hahas. lolsx. it was nice ((: loves smoked salmon. yayee. went shopping. i love that puma bag.
mama sae dun wan cos its sling. but i love it. anyone buy for me? hahas. cos 89 . lalalaas.
orange puma bag i love you. and also . hahas. demin jeans. cos like 285. im only allowed to try cant buy): i already spent 200 plus the previous dae. ahhh. hahas. sadded. din go sch/.
so sian. so tired. and i nvr go ballet today. ms foo will scold like siao. hahas.
mwack gang meeting today. i nvr go. heard smth badbad. hahas. tmr another for me :D.
im jus gonna listen =X. hahas. duno wad wil happen? lalala. eating my dinner now.
cai fan. haahs . bowling tmr. xD glad we bowled wel this yr (:

lovesloves.

22JULY2006

went out wif matt ytd. sunbian return him his greenie jacket hahas. went town.
went cine. decided on watching pirates but time so late. so we walk walk walk walk to LIDO.
and watched the show. yeps((: i love the show. kind of lame at the back. there will be a next season trust me! haahs. yeps. after that it was kindof late. mum ask me go find her. go all the wayyee to outram park. lost at the EXITs. actually went up the right one but i went dwn agin cos saw nobody. called mama, cousin picked up. tell me where to go. dhan tata! it was the exit i went up. =.=''' hahas. yep. went walking at OG wif my ahjia. granny! i ask her bout worldwar 2 cos she is like 92 this yr? born in 1910. i think hahas. yeps. said the kempetai marching loudly. something like that (: hahas, i <33>

23JULY2006

ballet in the morinng 9.30 but ms foo came late at 10:30. lesson end at 11;30. tired lahs.
piano at 1.30. tution at 2.30 . sosososo TIRED. went ate dinner at 501. bought lots of LAKEROL FORESTBERRIEs. i lovelove lakerol from the day i met ue . lalalalalas. lakerol cassis. green apple also veh nice.BUT eat too much will laosai =X i always eat whole box in few mins i guess.
and ue always stopped me and wanted to confiscate it . so tired. cannort tahan. ahh.

ICHI ; NI ; SAN ; SIE.

suddenly, the movie started playing. While watching, my tears roll down, my heart ache, a razor was infront of me. I picked it up slashed it on my hand, it was numb. If death could make me feel better, i willingly to. But now, i just want the movie to get out of my head. That's all.

WHATHURTsTHEMOST.

WHAT HURTS THE MOST
ii love it (: hope ue do. hah. if ue wan the song ask from me.

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ It
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

Not seeing that loving you
That’s what I was trying to do

VIDEO. ):

Hello ROSETANJIALI here((:
lets go out soon kaykaykay!!!!!


rose came over(: hahas. lala. had tournoment at 1.30.
today nort good day. i cried. i tried nort to. but just cant control.
cos of smth. today is 2oth yep. so . tournoment rocks but after three sucks.
cant say anythin here. those who are close who me may noe bah.
i have a video of us. show ue guys later. we are damn spastic lah.(:
played bball wif pinky. so funny, i laugh like so fake lah. who cares but him. lolsx.
im so tired. tmr sch end at 11:05 mayb going swimming bah. tkcares.
video show later(:

GOMENASAI -



having been posting cos im lke so bz these two days. mon too tired to on my freaking com =X hahas. tues too much homework that i cant even watch tv for 1 min. lolsx. lalalalalas.
i jus came bck frm school did my prodots powerpoint (: hhas. so funny lah. we kept playing like siao. doing those spastic actions lorhes. having flu now. cos i went wildwildwet in school. hope ue guys understand lah xD hahas. kae, if ue dont it means going under the rain. RUNhere.RUNthere. it was so fun larhs. ahahs. hmms. wad else. mrs shum changed our recess timing from 10:05 to 11:05 cos of a freaking test. wth lorhes. went shalon room to do powerpoints. so funneee . sat taxi back and i dont like the taxi driver. drive like duno hw to drive.keep on stepping the break. make me wan to puke larhs =X
today's happening (:
piano at 4.30 - 5.30
ballet at 6.30 -8
and nth else? REST ~ lalalalala.
im so tired and im freee this SAT. gt piano at 1.30 so ard 3 dhan can go out . hurhurs.
tmr tournoment again ((: hhas. TEAMEVENT.
ACE
CARA
MICHELLE
CHYNA (:

yayeee. happy racial harmony. i mayb wearing sari =Xwoo hahs. tc tc <33>

kiss goodbye <3


had ballet todaeee. miss foo was like so so late larhs. we practised our own from barre all the way to pointe work. ahahs xD miss foo came after that. did lots of pointe work and my legs are like aching and so suaning cos i stepped on lemon of cos (: hahas. lamers.
ate hokkien mee at bukitbatok wif papa&mama. hurhurs, went back. had tution jus nw.
science. tmr have common test! science ; electricity. zzz. hhas xD .
JIAYOU JWSS C'DIV. GOGOGO (:
hahas. they having the championships. jiayouu. (: so nw waiting for my dinner. and its like 10?
ahh. mayb nort eating anymore. hahas. so boredd staying at home. mayb every friday i will jus go swimming as a form of exercise hahas, sianxxzz. lolsx. its offically TEN now . so hungry.
grrr. ): where's daddy? DADDYYY. papa. laopa.AHPAHHH. hahas. nvm.
chyna, stop being lame. hahas. here comes my DADDY. going eat noww. ((: yummy xD
byebye. hahas. =XXX loves

TAGGGGG - reply .


NATASHA : diao don lame lah! hahas. yah i noe ure damn bored lahs! i can sense that ue r random. hahas xDD lovesloves&misses. <33

MATTboi : nvm, my mum woke up. hahas. but nort fun lah!!! .

SCORES


i hate my scores lah. ugghh. like indiv is like avrg 123? todays double 129 ? damn wad lah!
so pissed. gt my thumb disfigured. saddis lah..
first game was like 89, 132, 144, 149, 127, 138. first game pulled me dwn. )):
if i bowl like 120 or wad? i get at least a 135 avrg. im in the 61st place. shame to tel me.
so low lah )): . im sad. next thurs will be team. and next next mon wil be the last tournoment.
we can do it tgt as ONE ((: loveeee stmargs <33ed

i stood before you
crying as loud as i could
you stood there staring at me
i lost the pendant of love
a symbol of love
does it means that
once i lose it,
our love disappears?
i tried hard not to believe
but i cant.
i can see you disappearing from my life
and never appear again.
im just hoping more one more.

100706


hello ((: hahas. im feelin abit better alrdy xD lalallalas.
special thanks to matt&jianliang. hahas <33ed.>
australians came to our school today. sec threes are hosting them.
so yeah. their band performance was so niceeee. the guys are wearing high socks.
the girls were wearing ankle? shouldn't be the opposite? hahas. xD
they perform chan mali chan! hahas. so cutee lah. lalalas.
eating strawberries again (: loves<3>
tmr is TOURNOMENT. singles game.!
promise matt 150++average. dhan get TREATIEs xD hahas ((:
im excited, scared, nervous. thinking of all those things haahs. xD
me and ace will be bowling wiff cat high guys. woo. SNAKE~ haahs. but he bdiv.
lalalalas. good luck to stmargs c div tmr . using our metal fingers.

JIAYOU STMARGS C'DIV 2006

im so disapointed in myself. i got 69 for grade six. lowest in my life. i have no confidence to dance interfound anymore. Got merit. crystal g 81, distinction again. arghh. now like boxim dance lerh lor.. hais, sad lah! stupid examiner. or mayb i dance like shit? i dont know.
im so saddis. i dont know what to do.

i got this sealed envelop,
that shows my life&death
i open it, took out my results.
saw this two numbers. sixty-nine.
a merit that i got,
the lowest in my life.
i felt in despair.
dumbfounded, blaming myself.
i feel like crying out loud in somebody's arm.
felt to disapointing in myself.
all my efforts gone into drain.
train so hard. in the end.
i got this result.
i had already no more confidence to take the next examination.
as i know that , the next one wil be even tougher.
all i have to say about this is,
i got a death certificate.


take me away from this place -
rightnow. immediately.


69 ; death in my life. no more me.

xin li you hua xiang shou
dan shou bu chu kou.
xi wang shi jian wang liu ni de mei zai wo xing zhong
kan jian ni de yan kuang bu ting de zuan dong
yan lei man man de liu tong de shou bu chu kou X2
qing bei zou. don go.bei fang kai wo de shuang shou. bao jing woqing bei zou. don go bei fang kai wo de shuang shou . bao jing wo
never let me go ...

POINTE SHOE (:

8thJULY2006

hellos ((: i got my pointe shoes ! hahas. i loveeee itttt ! lalalalalalalalalas
i got a picture of it post it later ! hahas. had tution in the morning like 11?
ohh bro came home wif eunice. ahhas. dhan he so funny . he gave eunice something.
dhan he jus sae " na gei ni ! " ahas. simple as that - they have been tgt for EIGHTyears can?
gosh ! since i was p1. yepp xD they make a good couple. but the skin colour is like
BLACK&WHITE =X but can see tt my bro loves her lort. (:
i came home aft tution. watched some korean comedy or smth? 1pm show.
did my hwrk. i felt asleep as soon as i lied on the floor lah! slept till 3:45.
crystalLUM called me and wake me up ): hahas. i was sleepy. soooo TIRED.
bathe, changed, and go BALLET. i took cab there, cos i noe will be late.
saw jianliang on the way down. hahas =XX went ballet there is a new girl.
she's secFOUR from BOONLAYSEC(: hahas. yepp. xDD i was like so energetic today.
kept jumping. hahas. after ballet, went jp. meet my mama! went play para.
dhan wait for sister to makan at crystal jade LEVEL3. walk home. did my english work,
play PIANO. dhan the com! eating STRAWBERRIES now. i BOUGHT WILLBER'S ALBUM.
im going to his qian ming hui wif jinghui(: hahas. loveeeee WILLLPAN xD
tmr ballet at 9.30 -11 and ANH&ZHIXUAN coming my houseeee, do project!


THREEMOREDAYs (:

BACK FROM SWIMMING (:

it was so FUN today :DD haahas. when swimming (: WEEEEE~
hahas. MAHERA was so SEXY xD. HAZIRAH came along. and we had lotsa FUN .
hahas. i was wearling my lime green sportsbra. =XX hahas . we played something so lame.
nat threw the key and we have to find it? hahas. veh lame.
dhan stil gt TAXI. hazirah was carrying her. and i was carrying mahera. hahas.
hazirah won for the first time. second time we changed partner and i won! hahahs
second time i won. third time i WON ! hahas (: was fun today. after swimming went eating(:
hahas. after that was like go take train. went jp buy bubbletea and walk HOME. hahas.
loves nat manymany. dun be sad anymore yea? loveyou! hahas.oh yah. i think i saw somebody. hahas. xD

lovesloves. <33

hw can ue do that to me?

ERROR ! its JULY6th nort 7th! todae is SEVENTH (: hahas.

im going SWIMMING((: later at 4.30 wif NAT. MAHERA AND CHYNA xD so excited ((: loves.hahahas.
im eating STRAWBERRY((: so doodle nice. (: dont cal me later ppl! swimming till night? hahas. yeah.
exercise. going oin a diet! so FATT~. im like.. FATT.FATTT. finish all my hwrk xD hahas. yeahs.
i think im going nw . or wad? call nat first hahas. meet her at BUSTOP. xD today was funny dae
chloe's bear wif me. hahas. slping over at my hse? mayb hahas. xD lolsx. pompom(: lalaalaalalala
so sians. kae i realli gtg nw. REMEMBER DON CAL Me leave me a msg and i'll cal ue bakc xD chalalas.

much loves.

7/7/06


hello((: hahas. today mass dance was so lame. we REEACCCHH~ hahas. lolsx =X
. i slept during MRGOHs class.
i dont even know wads he toking about can? lolsx.
he's taking bout electricity. volts, current ammeter. and duno wad lah. hahas.xDD
lovesloves. slping. IT was CHINESE.
laoshi got angry. but he still veh funny and cute =XX lolsx.
hahas. had bowling jus nw.
was a very very very bad bad bad day!
i dun care wads the score today.
MRGOH , REMOVE JIAYI FRM TEAM RESERVED.
CAUSE? no discipline.
walau. DISCIPLINE=BOWLING. wow lah.
jiayi felt so hurt can? she cried. Anyone will feel hurt also lorhes.
ue train hard to get into team. nvr get in nvm reserve. train , go to yishun. money
all this. all her hard work her everything . all nth.
wads does mrgoh knows bout bowling? gsd!!! spare for her feelings can?
im nort sure whether teachers read BLOGs. mine? i dont care anymore.
mrgoh took jiayi out of the team w/o any reasonable reason.
and replace another girl. who hadn't been practicing in yishun.
nort bad rite? wad type of teacher is he man? so pissed. so banana pissed. arghh
dhan i dropped my bowling ball on CARACHANG. sorrie cara.
but thanks to her adidas shoe. plus her metal FEET. im realli sorrie.
now my THUMB is disfigured. lolsx. bloodclot. skins. so disfigured lah! haiyoh ):
4 more days to tournment. is tt the rite sp? hahas. hahas. so EXCITED and NERVOUS
no supporters again, this yr . MRgoh says our NEW bowling skirt is short.
if ours short dhan tennis de leh? lolsx. we're wearing our CLEANERs uniform again :D
haahs. nvm lah. jus bowl well ccan lerhs. xD . ballet was so tiring ytd.
BALLET TMR. crystal din come ytd. miss her like heaven lah! hahas.
lovesppl ((:
SUPPORT STMARGs at YISHUN (:

im loving it

i wanna metal fingers )):
went out wif crystal tyty and yunian yah.
so funnny lahs ((: we sang like lots and lots lots lots of SONGs.
YUNIAN play para can? i shall put the pictures up.
i WORE my new heels xDD hurhurs. i love it.
sangsangsang. ate lunch in kbox , yep .
it was the singing day((:
dhan so SUAYY. saw garylim. hahas. we nvr ask him go =XX
hahas. so SUAY lah. aft tt i went bugis meet mama! bought clothes for KORKOR.
and LAOPA. i buy de xD hahas. use my own money larhs. x( . hahas nvm lahrs.
WENT bowling at yishun wif ACEYY xD we bowled like NINEGAMEs?
my games was lke 150+ 140+ 130+ 120+ 110+ ? yep more cant rbm.
hand pain like siao. ACE, realli. hw i wish i have METAL FINGERs.
today in school total DISASTER somethings happened.
im sooo happy for my ALY darling. ahahs. yeppp((:
good news from her lahs xD . todayy was a LONGGGG day.
had bowling aft prodots. played. hahas. i played 161 todae((:
and i cant bowl anymore. so pain. my thumb. so SWOLLEN ; REDISH ; BLOODCLOTISH
sounds so disgusting lah! hahaas. loves BOWLING stills <33s>
having competition next wk manzzxz. from 11thJULY.
PEOPLE SUPPORT STMARGs. so sad, we wont be havin supporters again this yr.
mayb i try to talk to mr yee. yepp. for the sake of my TEAM (:
TEAM ONE : TEAM TWO : TEAM THREE :
Acelyn Balvinder Belinda
Michelle Clarice Katherine
Cara Charlene GOSH i forgot.
Chyna Tiffany but i still love ue guys
Jiayi Shuhada
LOVEs LOVEs


JIAYOU((: go stmargs. pokla dots! . . . . . . hahas. loves.<33